Must be something I ate

Heston's Roman Feast

It's been busy at work, but now I'm feeling a bit crook too. It could well be something I ate, but for a truly queasy feeling, no one did dinner parties like the Romans:

The most interesting bit for me was the recreation of the 'Trojan pig'. This is a joking dish described by Petronius in the Satyricon, but known elsewhere in Roman literature. It's a large roast pig stuffed with sausages, so that when the flesh of the pig is slit, what looks like intestines tumble out.

In Petronius, it is a neat joke played on the dinner guests, staged between the host Trimalchio and his cook. The pig is brought in to the banquet, and with it comes the cook -- full of apologies that he has forgotten to gut the animal. Trimalchio feigns anger and orders the cook to strip for a whipping, until the other guests plead for mercy. 'Ok,' says Trimalchio, 'gut it now'. And out come all those sausages . . . and everyone applauds.

Treating a cook like that probably now only occurs in Madonna's household. She would probably also enjoy this:

He [chef Heston Blumenthal, whose TV recreation of a Roman banquest is the subject of this article] had better luck with Petronius' ejaculating cake, which was the centrepiece of his Roman pudding.

A new dessert menu idea for Gordon Ramsay, perhaps?