The truth about Al Franken

I get the feeling that the Weekly World News does not get the attention it deserves. People just get sick of too many poorly photoshopped "alien meets President" photos, I guess, and read The Onion for parody now instead.

But some of the writing still seems to me to be pretty funny, such as this piece (even if it does have a distinctly Colbert ring about it):

In a private ceremony involving robes and jasmine scented aromatherapy candles, Franken was sworn in as a Democrat with his right hand placed on the original hand-written Communist Manifesto, and standing atop a Bible. While waving olive branches, the assembled Democrats watched as Nancy Pelosi branded him with the words “Peace at Any Cost.”

Now Al Franken will have all the perks of the upper echelons of the Democratic Party. He will have access to the Democrat Library, which includes all the war plans of Jimmy Carter and the actual Kenyan birth certificate of Barack Obama. He also received a Democrat Decoder Ring, which also gives him a 20% discount at Pottery Barn.

As a Senator, Franken will now be instrumental to the Democratic Party. His presence grants them a filibuster-proof “Super-Majority.” Franken’s win in the Minnesota Courts places the Democrats even closer to pushing through strong reforms they’ve been looking forward, to like European-style Socialism, sex education in kindergarten and mandatory gay marriage.

When asked for comment, Franken said, “I’m glad that my presence will help turn America into what it needs to be: Europe.”

On a more serious note, the Christian Science Monitor points this out:

It's better for Democrats than 59. But a Senate supermajority didn't much help the last president to have one: Jimmy Carter.