Well that's a co-incidence: I have been wondering lately the very question posed at Slate: What to say to motivate your aimless teen.
I wouldn't be the first parent to wonder - why does my teenager seem to be feeling uncertain and not have any passionate interest in anything? Even what's she's talented at doesn't really move her much.
Why doesn't she know more fundamental general knowledge about the history of the world? At least my son read books for a while, before his phone took control; and he watched Horrible Histories and has some knowledge of the big wars and revolutions. [As a (perhaps sexist) generalisation, do girls have less interest in history because they don't enjoy imagining themselves in the midst of dangerous adventure in the same way that boys do?] And don't speak to me about religion or philosophy - of the latter she knows nothing, but she's had exposure to Christianity of both Catholic and Protestant hue, and even still sometimes accompanies a friend to one of the "let's put on a show!" brand of evangelical suburban church. But she openly says at home that she suspects there's nothing behind the curtain, so to speak.
I suggested last night that she should try the ideas in Immanuel Kant's Critique of Practical Reason: she said I may as well have just said that in a foreign language, for all the sense it made.
So yeah, I'm feeling the need for a Guide for Life type book for this type of young adult. Of course, this is what Jordan Peterson's recent career is made out of, but he's full of waffle and rubbish such as curing his depression by eating just meat - he's not someone I trust to be imparting information and common sense.
And it can't be long - it needs to be relatively succinct.
If I can't find one, and I doubt that something that would have my seal of approval exists, I should write it myself. Getting teenagers to read it would be the challenge. It would have to come in multimedia format for a phone, too...
14 comments:
Constantly telling kids ridiculous lies leads to demoralisation. So for example the idea of dark energy and that the universe is heading for a heat death. These lies are very damaging to kids. Or that life-giving C02 is killing the natural world. These lies are designed to send people into despair.
Um, she would not have a clue about dark energy. She has probably heard of the Big Bang, because of the TV sitcom, but not really understand what it means.
Climate change is real, but it won't kill humanity, and is no reason to not have children. I encourage humans to reproduce, if they can, as its a natural part of life that it feels good to be part of.
Climate change was always real you moron. Do you get around the house pulling this Orwellian language?
Of course she has heard of the big bang and all that other fake science. They pitch it at the kids to demoralize them. Along with the CO2 lies. These aren't just a substitute religion for stupid people. These lies are a weapon.
Not a book. A mentor, or an example of someone to emulate.
Stepford
GMB is right on this one. You’re killing the kid with this gerbil warming religious obsession. Leave the kid be and stop trying to turn her into that Swedish hitler youth member.
Actually, I pretty infrequently talk about climate change at home, apart from checking from time to time that my kids believe it's real and a real problem. They are pretty sensible, though, and not prone to conspiracy belief, so no problems there.
Why you should not take life advice from internet weirdos!
Actually, make that the title of one of the chapters of your book, Steve.
"Actually, I pretty infrequently talk about climate change at home, apart from checking from time to time that my kids believe it's real and a real problem."
We have the confession. He's demoralising his own children by lying to them and by using Orwellian language to wrong-foot them and confuse their thinking. He's going to bullshit them into an early grave.
In other news the Jew impeachment farce continues. And people still use fantasy temperature graphs drawn by Jews, bearing no relation at all to anything that has happened to the planet.
This might overwhelm your daughter: The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus. He argues that the only truly important philosophical question is the question of suicide. It's short, even translated from the French Camus has a beautiful and succinct writing style, and he emphasizes that the point is to live not spend one's life thinking about so many philosophical style questions.
BTW a word of caution: sometimes when people start thinking about the meaning of life it is because they are becoming depressed.
I'm not sure she is thinking about the meaning of life all that much: just that she is saying she doesn't have any real idea what sort of future work life she would enjoy. (This is not an uncommon thing, though, amongst teenagers, I know.) I had suggested to her some months ago that she think about what type of work she might like in a broad sense - one in which she offers care and service to people (in which case, health care or teaching or even hospitality might fulfil that desire to be of good service to someone.) Or does she feel she wants to be more self focused (so the creative arts, for example. She's not cut out for academia, though).
This hasn't helped, apparently.
As far as religion is concerned, she doubts that there is a God but is not inclined to put the effort in to read more broadly about what philosophy has had to say about how to live a good life in the absence of religious views about it. I have quite a few introductory books on religion and philosophy that I started reading as a teenager and into adulthood; but no, it's not on a screen so that's out. She is not one to read at length for pleasure or self instruction.
She does say she wants to travel to places with nice, blue water - Tahiti, for example. If she had a million dollars with which to travel to some places she fancies like that, with one or two of her friends, she would be happy. For a while anyway :)
That's difficult Steve. She is looking for a meaning for her life. Perhaps approach that from the negative. Suggest to her that if she doesn't find a way of making a living that she finds meaningful then she can always consider working at McDonalds for the rest of her days. That might give her pause for thought. :)
... nice, blue water. Yeah we all have fantasy places. To quote an old Zen bloke: If you can't find it where you are standing where do you expect to wander in search of it?
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