Jack the Insider, the ever genial blokey writer, says today (in relation to the apparent suicide of that ex footy player) that he too has had periods of suffering from suicidal ideation. He writes:
...for many years, suicide ideation was like
an unwelcome houseguest I couldn’t get shot of. The demons of anxiety,
panic and desolation mutter away. “I’ll never be any good.’’ “I’m
letting everyone down.’’ Combine that dark mantra with a sleepless
couple of nights and you’re in the danger zone, borderline psychotic,
suffering silently from a pain that won’t go away.
Some people still cling
to the atavistic notion that suicide is for the weak. It’s not. It can’t
be. It is almost the hardest thing anyone can do, bearing in mind the
hardest is to survive and live on.
Mental
illness is, if not invisible, then something sufferers are adept at
camouflaging. It hides in plain sight. There are no ugly blemishes or
boils, no hacking coughs, no greying of complexions. It is almost
impossible to see in others.
I’ve
spoken on live television. I’ve spoken at venues where audiences that
number from fifty to five thousand. I flick the switch to the
wisecracking good bloke, that part of my personality that people expect
to see. I do it easily and without any reservations. I like that part of
me, but I know it is a disguise.
Well that's very clear, direct writing on the topic, if a little worrying in its warning that it can be impossible to tell if someone is suffering this way. (On the other hand, I suppose, it could be seen as comforting for those who blame themselves after a suicide for not noticing.)
He also says this:
Beyond mental illness the one thing they shared with Frawley was a
personality type. They are characters who everyone wants to be with.
Larger than life, the lives of the party. I often wonder if there is
some correlation between that personality type and frequency of mental
health problems.
It could just be more my personality than any particular insight I have into other people, but it's fair to say that I have always felt that I do
not want to be around "life of the party" types; perhaps due to a sense I've instinctively had that brashness can too easily be a cover for inner dissatisfaction?
Either that, or I just dislike other people having too much fun. :)
Also on this topic, I noticed on Twitter
this thread by some people complaining about RU OK day - many saying that they had suffered mental health issues and they did not enjoy the day at all, thinking it was shallow and a patronising take on a problem which lasts all year, not just one day, etc etc.
To be honest, even allowing for their problems, this annoys me. Any "day" which intends to promote awareness or raise money for research can annoy people affected by the illness. I'm sure I read once that parents who have lost a baby to SIDS can find the "red nose day" a distressing reminder of their loss. I can understand that, at least for the first few years after their baby's death.
But really, you have to allow for the greater good that such promotions may achieve, and the good intentions of the people who create such awareness of a health issue.
Sure, have a whinge about the lack of readily accessible mental health services, if that is something you know about, but don't get upset at a program that can do some good.